MLB NEWS

Wednesday, March 13, 2013

Breaking News: Bart is Newest Franchise Manager


            The search is over. Commissioner Russ Travers has confirmed that mystery dark horse candidate Bryan Bart will become the newest member of The Franchise. After three rounds of interviews, Bart was chosen as the new face of Roland Zhou’s old squad, beating out candidates Eric Rose, Richie Travers, and Jesse Wolf for the spot.

            Rose took the news in elegant fashion, stating in a text to the commissioner: “Thank you for the opportunity” and a bunch of other classy diplomatic shit that makes for a terrible blog post. Richie Travers, who was out of the running as of yesterday afternoon, could not be reached for comment. Jesse Wolf was never once seriously considered. Ever.


            Bart only entered consideration after personally contacting the Commissioner on March 10th just after midnight. “I hadn’t even considered him when he reached out. He’s actually been on The Franchise waiting list for a long time” Travers said. Bart's candidacy has been kept in secret until now, which has created quite a buzz amongst fellow managers and fans. Speculation for the “mystery candidate” has ranged from Matt Pru or Brian Pender, to Travers’ friend from grad school Xun Du, who, up until 24 hours ago (when I explained to him how to play) did not understand the game of baseball.


            Some concern has been expressed as to the lack of a democratic process in choosing a new manager. “Ultimately my decision was based on availability, personality, game knowledge and best ‘fit’ for the league at this time” Travers said in a league statement, “There was no vote, I can only hope the league trusts my judgment on this one. I think giving him a chance to prove himself is the best way to go about the situation.”


            “Never even thought of him…I’m all for it” League official and five year manager Brad Calandrella said, surprised upon hearing the news. “[I’d]rather him over Richie [Travers] I guess, less competition.”


But Bart isn’t going to be starting from scratch, he’s inheriting a championship runner-up team meticulously built over the years by a seasoned veteran. With Clayton Kershaw, Stephen Strasburg, Cliff, Lee, Matt Cain, and Yu Darvish all keeper possibles, The window for a championship is wide open. 

“That team was Zhou's baby, he’s got a chance to make some big waves right out of the gate, this is the best situation a new manager has been in going into his first year.” Said Travers. Bart will join Andy Musto and Dan Alber as the only manager who have not been with the league for the full 6 year history. They both began their Franchise managerial careers with a 9th place finish.


“Holy shit I’m excited… I’m so pumped this is my first legit fantasy baseball league” Bart announced at his introductory press conference. But he's no stranger to fantasy sports, fantasy football is Bart's game, he's the commissioner of his own competitive fantasy football league, in which Travers has had a team for the last 2 years.


With the drama of a vacant managerial spot behind us it’s time to focus on the upcoming keeper deadline (Friday) and draft (March 30th). To echo Bart’s final words in his midday press conference:  “I think this is gonna be a lotta fun.”

2 comments:

  1. Congratulations Bart on becoming the newest member of the Franchise! As our league welcomes you there needs to be a clear understanding of one VERY important rule. You cannot under any circumstances draft as many pitchers as Roland Zhou, or just like pitching as much in general. Good luck this year!

    John DeMovellan
    2012 World Champion Young Guns

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  2. Completely agree with choice and you know Bart loves his sports, welcome to the league, draft requires drugs and alcohol

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